October 3: Anyone want any of my kids?

I usually love Wednesdays since I get to be re-united with the kids.   The time with them started off GREAT and then for some reason all hell broke loose.  I’m so glad they are in bed right now.

Highlights of My Working Day:

  • I woke up later than I would have liked; got set up in my kitchen and enjoyed lots of coffee and actually ate breakfast.  I watered my plants and stretched in the sun.  It was a beautiful, hot day.
  • I had some conference calls and tried to get some stuff done but could not get motivated – I honestly did a lot of nothing today.  So I will likely work after I get this post out since I feel a bit guilty and I do need to get some stuff done.
  • 12 noon hit and I was on the road to get the kids!   I really enjoyed the ride.   It was beautiful out, there was great music on the radio, and I was in an EXCELLENT mood.

Highlights of the Rest of the Day:

  • I volunteered in Big Bro’s classroom today during “Science Time”.   We planted two different kinds of seeds (alfalpha and grass) in little cups and watered them with fertilizer water.    I worked with two kids at a time.   We were asked to ask them to investigate the seeds and talk about how they were the same and different.  I loved it.   I called all the kids “farmers” and gave them fist-pumps when they were done.   Big Bro was all smiles.    I couldn’t believe how many kinds of responses I got from the kids when asked about the differences in the seeds.   It went beyond shape and feel to even the different sounds that the seeds made when falling like rain; way to cute.
  • It was still a bit early so I took Big Bro with me to the store to get some food.  He kept drawing himself closer to snacks and candy and was joking putting sweets in the cart and then putting them back.   He cracked me up today.  I’m glad I had the time alone with him.
  • Pick up for Red was great; her face was beaming.   Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were busy painting.  Twin Crazy had two pig-tails in her hair and I never saw it like that before; she looked so cute; they were so proud of how they put their paintings in the drying rack, washed their hands, and gathered their things all by themselves.  They love it there – as do I.
  • On the ride home they all ate snacks and we called my brother and sung “Happy Wedding to You’ – he got married yesterday in city hall [a different story for a different time].   None of the kids wanted to sing with me.  Twin Crazy had her hands on her eyes.  But both twins were swaying and dancing to the song.  Again, I was cracking up.
  • When we got back we saw the school bus and two new kids that we have not met before – a set of twins aged 6.   We said we would visit them over the weekend.   As far as I know now, we have 16 kids on our block, all aged 8 and younger.   Big Bro wanted to play with the new kid across the street (Legos) so we dropped him off.
  • Twin Husky helped me with the garbage cans and picked out the color can he wanted to bring up next.
  • Red and Twin Crazy were bonding as sisters and were doing each other’ hair.   Then they all played house in a HUGE box from Amazon.  We looked at wedding pictures.  We sang again to my brother.   The girls did a felt project with cut out shapes of felt.   Twin Husky was busy watering the garden.   I drew a picture of Dora for Red on felt.
  • It was all great until Big Bro came back.  Then the trouble started.  Teasing, crying, bikes crashing into each other, more crying, fighting, pinching, throwing things, hitting heads with water bottles, hiding toys….   there must have been at least 50 times tonight where there was a kid crying or fighting.   I couldn’t take it.   I thought that dinner would help but it did not.
  • At least the highlight of dinner was eating outside with citronella candles so we had no bugs for the first time.   The kids ate well and they wanted to talk about Halloween.  They are excited about Halloween in this neighborhood with all of the kids.  So am I.
  • After dinner we made pudding but then Twin Husky threw a beer opener and it hit me in the chin, hard.   So he lost dessert tonight.  More crying.   I can’t win.
  • Twin Husky and I cuddled more tonight during booktime; I think he felt bad about throwing (hopefully he learned something).   The kids were still causing problems for me during bed…. fighting over space, asking for more water.  I told them I was at my breaking point and for everyone just to go to sleep.  I’ve had it.

How does a day start out so great with the kids and then suddenly fall to pieces with ALL FOUR of them??!!??!!??   This was crazy today.   I can’t figure it out.   I spent REALLY good one-on-one time with Big Bro, Red, and Twin Husky.   But still Big Bro was such a pain in the ass!!!!!   They are at least quiet now so hopefully I can get some work done.   This was a day I’d like to remember and forget at the same time.   Hopefully it will be better tomorrow —

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

Gig Tip: Have your clothes WORK for YOU

It may just be my style, or lack thereof, but I’ve decided to follow some simple rules when it comes to clothes for the workplace:

Must Have’s:

  1. It must not itch.  ANYWHERE.  Not at the seams, not at the frills, not in the collar, not under the armpits, ANYWHERE.
  2. Similar to the above, it needs to be COMFORTABLE.   You need to feel like you can run from your house (with clingy kids) to the minivan to the train station to the office and sit/stand/present/walk around and then back again back home without the clothes getting in the way.   You have enough things to worry about let alone having your focus misdirected to your damn, uncomfortable clothes.
  3. It must be FLATTERING for you.  It must work with your body and make you feel sexy.  I know you are a mother, but you are also a woman.  You need to feel like one.  You need to feel like the clothes are enhancing you – looking good on you.  DO NOT BUY SOMETHING THAT ONLY LOOKS OK BUT HAS A GREAT PRICE-TAG.     Absolutely do not do that.   You will wind up filling up your clothes with mediocrity, wasting your money, and not feeling good about yourself.
  4. The simpler, the better.   Anything too trendy does not pass the test of time, and my closet (and bank account) is limited — I simply cannot have several closets of clothes and cycle through them through the years when things come back in style.  So call me a frump.   I have thick skin.
  5. It must not break the bank.  I don’t like paying full price on clothes.   Suggested retail price is a fabrication of imagination.   I don’t mind paying more for simple, muted classics though (e.g., black blazer, black pants, etc.).

(not me, but a dress by Three Dots)

Nice to have’s:

  1. I absolutely love it when I buy something that I feel can take me to the office yet also be worn on the weekends, or with the kids, or out to a casual dinner.  You get it.   Time is too limited for changes.   Space is too constrained for multiple sets of clothes in bulk.   Streamline your life.
  2. I love it when it is made of a fabric where I can launder it myself.  I despise the cost of dry cleaning and also the piles of clothes and the extra trip/errand that needs to be done.   It is so much easier for me to collect the stuff that I can launder with gentle soap on a gentle cycle and then hang dry.  I don’t mind it at all, especially when I know it is saving me money and giving me versitility with what I am wearing.

My favorite in terms of brand is three dots.   Very comfy clothes that work well and play well.   My favorite stores right now are Amazon.com (of course — they make it so easy to find things, sort, filter, and find great deals) and believe it or not, Kohl’s (especially at the end of the season – you can find DIRT CHEAP clothes that feel and look great – again, the simpler the better – so great for layering or even waiting until the next season).

When it comes to shoes, I still have a lot to learn.  I keep some heels in my office drawer but have not yet perfected the shoe thing in terms of comfort, style or durability.   I’ll think about that going forward.  I have some favorites, but nothing I can fully endorse.

In short, have your clothes work for you, versus you working for your clothes.    ‘Nuf said.

What other ideas do you ladies have???   Please share!!

Hope everyone is having a good start to the week

– Mama K

September 20: Gypsy living

It’s been one week since last I wrote a post!   Sorry.  Things have been a bit hectic around here.  I’ve been doing a lot of the same over the past week, but also recalibrating my own life and I needed to take a break from the blog.   But I’m back.

Today is a Thursday where I have Twin Crazy and Twin Husky home with me, while Big Bro and Red go to school/daycare.   We take a drive along 2 highways to get to co-parent’s neighborhood.  Usually the Twins and I go back and forth 4 times on this day.  I decided to try something different today.  I’m not sure if it worked.

Gypsy living.   They travel in groups and have things – they just choose to roam and not settle in any location for a long period of time.   Well, we were gypsies today.   For this experience I had to pack a small bag of extra clothes, snacks for the day, a potty, two pillows, two sleeping bags, two kid blankets, some diapers, wipes, water, a suck blanket/ lovey and one Tiger.

  • Drop offs were fine.
  • Twin Crazy, Twin Husky and I first went to Lowe’s to return some things from a laundry-room project we just completed.   Twin Husky liked carrying some of the gear.   They both liked playing on the big cart in the parking lot and acting like monkeys.
  • I drove by Smart-n-Final and decided to go in since my Costco days have been cut short thanks to my in-laws.  I still can’t believe they stopped my membership when I have to feed 4 of their grandchildren.   Yet I still am paying for their son’s health-care insurance.  I just don’t get it.   Anyway, the deals were great and I’m happy to know that I don’t need Costco anyway, thank you very much.
  • We went to the bank.
  • We went to Kohl’s so I could buy some more kitchen gear that needed to be replaced post move-out.   Saved 20% and also used Kohl’s cash so it was quite a bargain.  The kids at this point were very crazy so I made them each sit down and stay seated while I shopped.  They listened well, thank goodness.
  • I then drove around the complex to a Starbucks.  My intent was to work while they slept.   NOT.    I set them up to sleep – pulled out the other seats and pulled down the mini-van seats into beds.   Spread out the sleeping bags as cover and set up the pillows and blankets.   They each were having way too much fun.  We snacked on grapes and bread and they tried to fall asleep.   Twin Crazy said “this is going to be a fun fun ride”.  She is so cute.   They weren’t doing much sleeping so I went between them to stop their playing.  Bad move.  I wound up falling asleep myself.  I was supposed to be working (big conference next week).   I woke up to Twin Crazy crying because she peed herself.   I’m actually glad she did since we were running late to pick up Big Bro.
  • Pick ups were fine, uneventful.  Ride home was fine, uneventful.
  • We got home, relaxed, I made a pasta dinner, and we had leftover home-made ice-cream from the night before.  We settled in to watch a movie together.  Bedtime was fast.

I’m finishing up my day but I actually have a lot of work to do.   I’m sooooo tired.   Today was too much.  Too many errands.  These poor twins were carted all around and didn’t sleep well.   Next time I try this it will include maybe one errand and a trip to the park where they can play and I can relax.

I also realized that although I love the freedom that gypsy living brings, I think I most cherish the familiarity and comfort of home, of roots, of belonging.

I’m gearing up for the big conference next week which has kept me very busy.   I think it will go fine and I’m actually looking forward to it.

Gotta go and do some work –

– Mama K

September 4: First days!

Today Twin Crazy and Twin Husky started “traditional” daycare, versus the “home” daycare that we’ve had them in since they were babies.   And it was Red’s first day in a new “classroom” at daycare – “Pre-K”.   I decided to drive down to co-parent’s neighborhood to see their first days in action…
Highlights of the Morning and Commute:

  • I woke up early and left the house at 7 AM, with my phone free of pictures and fully charged.
  • I got there way early – there was hardly any traffic.  So I went to co-parent’s at 7:45 AM.   Red was having problems with socks.   I offered to take her into school and meet the rest there.
  • Red and I waited for Twin Crazy and Twin Husky and I took lots of pictures of her.  For some reason I missed her like crazy yesterday.    I just kept thinking about the times she says “what can I do with you” and I’m always too stretched to really spend any time with her.   All I wanted to do yesterday is sit down and color with her.   I missed her so much; so this morning I grabbed extra hugs and kisses and tried to make her feel extra special.
  • Twin Crazy and Twin Husky came in, with their little backpacks.  Sooooooooo cute.  They were really excited.  They checked out their cubbies, the sofa, the potties, a crayon activity (and talked to each other about the colors), the play-kitchen, the doll house….   Twin Husky carried his Tiger non-stop and even took off his shoes when he sat on the little couch.   They had no problems with our leaving.  They looked like they were already having a blast.
  • Red’s drop off was fine.  She was shy at first, but then warmed up when she saw some friends.   Her face was glowing and she jumped right into activities with her friends.
  • I missed the ferry, so I decided to work from Starbucks.   The commute was literally 5 minutes.


Highlights of My Working Day:

  • I set up at Starbucks, got another coffee.   I was actually very productive.   I had several conference calls and got closer to firming up the Agenda and attendees to the forum we are having later this month.
  • I followed up on old invoices
  • I started to confirm the Agenda for the other forum we will have in October.
  • I did some admin items such as timesheets


The Rest of the Day:

  • I called a quits at 4 PM and went clothes shopping at Kohl’s with $3o Kohl’s Cash.  I spent an incremental $2 on 2 dresses and a pair of “skorts”.  I’m psyched about the killer deal and will wear one of the dresses tomorrow.
  • I did some food shopping – again with coupons.  Safeway’s deals are great and they give you discounts on gas which I really appreciate these days.   But, I saw that they double charged me for bread and believe it or not but I actually spent the time to go back to get the $5 returned to me.   Again, watching every dollar.   Oh how my life has changed.
  • I had the kids tonight since co-parent is on a business trip.   So this Tuesday night with them was a gift.
  • Pick ups were EXCELLENT!   Twin Crazy and Twin Husky looked tired, but very very happy.  Again, Twin Husky was carrying around his Tiger.   They were eating snacks.  They seemed really happy – each with their own seat right across from each other.  I asked if they were set up next to each other for naps and the teachers confirmed yes.   There were no tears.  I am thrilled.  They had a great first day.
  • Red was excited at pick up too; she had a great day and I came back with lots of art.
  • Pick up for Big Bro was fine; he goes with a neighbor who is a life-saver to me.
  • On the way home we reconnected and caught up with each other.  We talked about the past few days and the birthday party they went to and Big Bro’s owie and the first days of school.  I talked about the guinea pig and how I bought her different greens and how big she’s getting.   It was a great ride home, but we hit traffic.   The kids were happy despite this.
  • I started dinner as soon as we got in; the kids were playing with Cocoa.  And drawing.  And cutting pictures out of magazines.
  • I did homework with Big Bro.  He read some words, counted to 100, and wrote a sentence about the drawing of his family.  His sentence was “I have a new pet.”  He spelled out all the words and the sentence by himself.  I can’t get over it.
  • We ate well except for Big Bro.  He still has stomach issues.   This has been going on way too long… almost one week.  I think I need to take him to a doctor.
  • After dinner Big Bro took it easy on the couch while the rest of us took out the garbage.  I usually don’t have them on these nights so this was fun with them.  They “helped” me carry the bins down to the street.
  • We all picked out the clothes for the next morning so we can get a jump on that without hesitation tomorrow.
  • Bedtime was great; they got changed without a problem.  Books were no problem.  Getting them to sleep was a minor problem – the girls wanted to talk.   They talked about what scares them.  Red is scared of alligators but I assured her that the zoo is very far away and there is absolutely NO WAY that the alligator is going to escape his tank and walk all the way over here.   Twin Crazy agreed that the alligator does have a big mouth and could eat us.   And bugs.   And that the bugs would be mad if the alligator ate the other bugs.   Big Bro was busy looking at Cocoa eating her new dandelion greens.  We sat there for awhile looking at her eat.  I asked him if he likes having a pet and not only did he say “Yes” right away, but he immediately said that he wants to have a dog too.   Twin Husky was excited about the day and kept saying that he is a big boy.

It was a great day; I was actually a working mom again which feels good but also extremely exhausting since I am out of practice.   We are going to have a VERY early morning tomorrow so I need to get some things done tonight.   I will work from Starbucks again tomorrow but for only 1/2 day; I’m looking forward to getting home with the kids at a more reasonable time tomorrow so we can eat earlier, spend more time together, and not be stuck in commuting traffic…  I want to talk to them more since their conversations either crack me up, surprise me from the intelligence, or both.

It was a GREAT day.  One that I will remember because of the “first days”.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

Random Thoughts: What does Labor Day mean to you?

I must confess.  I still get confused between Memorial Day and Labor Day.   I guess the “Ms” stick together, Memorial Day happens in May.   So today is Labor Day.  Hopefully this trick will stick for me going forward.

Historically, the holiday came about and was initiated by labor unions.  There is no real substantive underlying “movements” or monumental meaning for the holiday.  But in modern times it does signify, at least informally, the end of summer, parties, BBQs, being with family, taking it easy, shopping….

It seems like for working mothers there is a twist on words – laboring to bring our children into the world and also playing a role in the workforce.    It seems like this should be an extra-special day for us working mothers.  A day where we get to take a break from the juggling act and spend extra time with the family in a relaxed way.   A way for us to celebrate another year of working hard and surviving another year of the “grind”.   Yet also celebrating family, your kids… possibly the main reason you work so hard now to begin with.

Photo source:  milagrosboutique.com

For me… well what did I do?   I did not have the children today.   So I celebrated solo – not bad though.  I’m not complaining.   I woke up late.   I cleaned Cocoa’s cage.  I went food shopping.   I bought a patio set (taking advantage of 50% off end of summer clearance!!!!  I am psyched!).   I ate a lot of vegetables, but the smell of BBQ in the air made me think of cheeseburgers for most of the day.   I hacked down more dead raspberry bush vines to prepare for garbage pick up.   I am going to open up a Guinness and begin my “clean out my closet” project.    So, I think I had a pretty good variety of activity today – the only thing I missed was BBQ and the kids.    But I will see them tomorrow.

What does Labor Day mean to you?   How did you spend the Labor Day holiday?

Thanks for listening –

– Mama K

Staying Sane: “Staycation” with kids and Nana

My life and standard of living has changed pretty dramatically over the course of the year.   In years past, the term “vacation” would have meant an early AM drive to the airport, headed to a far-away place.   Even when the kids entered the world, they did not hold me back.   Now however, I am essentially living paycheck to paycheck, and I also do not have the luxury of having the kids’ time in big blocks.  Except for last week.   From Tuesday night, August 21 through tomorrow AM, Aug 27 it is my time with the kids.   And my mom came out for a visit.

I’m feeling full now.  And happy.  The days were spent doing not that much of anything, but yet doing everything at the same time.   There were no destinations, no special restaurants, no special activities.  Just time together and gearing up for Big Bro’s first day of school, which is tomorrow.   I will be driving him in, and I am soooooo thankful for this change in routine to be able to share this day with him.

Highlights of the past week with Nana:

  • Waiting for Nana in the “park and call” and talking with the kids about their excitement about Nana’s visit.
  • Introducing “Cocoa” to Nana and having the kids show her how they take care of her.
  • Watching a movie and air-popping pop-corn and exploding with excitement and laughter.
  • Early morning sounds of footsteps and Twin Husky coming into our bed at 7 AM, each morning, like clockwork.  No words.  Just him, his Tiger, and him scurrying up on the bed, getting  under the covers.   So sweet.
  • Looking at the bus come for the neighborhood kids for their school (they started this week).  The bus comes to my driveway.   I am hoping the kids have the opportunity to take this bus next year.  Twin Husky was upset that he was not able to go on the bus.
  • Taking “Cocoa” to the vet because of her dry ear.  Watching the examination.  All kids watching and learning, intently.   Looking at the big doggies in the waiting room.
  • Me going to a “lunch meeting” at work and Nana taking care of all kids on her own.
  • Opening a box that arrived that was actually sent by Nana – filled with supplies for each of the kids’ desks, clothes, playdough, and outdoor fun gear….
  • Lots of playdough…. every day.
  • Going to a haircut appointment and deciding to take “my girls” with me; it was so cute to divide and conquer.  And for me to go out and have them watch me get a haircut (which I desperately needed)
  • Filling up our bird-feeder, and then waiting for the birds to come back; hearing birds singing wildly each morning and then counting the bluejays in the back yard.
  • Completing my project of putting deer netting around the final section of my garden.  Maybe now I’ll be able to see/eat a strawberry.
  • Slip-n-slide, blow up pool in our front yard.  Twin Husky going crazy and diving through the water.  Shivering.   Looking like a football player, only 3 feet tall.   Twin Crazy and Twin Husky fighting over a little tiny water shooter, and then Twin Crazy stomping off mad only to return with a HUGE, “Rambo” looking like water semi-automatic.   It was outrageously funny.   A neighborhood friend coming over for a bit after seeing the water slip-n-slide in our front yard from the street as he drove by with his father.
  • Putting together the rest of my blinds in my kitchen.   They look great.
  • Picnics for lunch, outside.
  • Going to Target with Big Bro and Red to do “back to school” shopping.
  • Nana making “icebox cake” with the kids, their little routine together.
  • Cleaning out my storage shed and moving in some file cabinets to make room in the house.
  • We jointly decided that Sunday would be a special “Chocolate Sunday” since that was the last day of vacation and since Nana would be leaving on that day.  Twin Husky remembered this fact this morning when he woke up.  It was the first thing he was talking about.

So, it really was many days of just “existing” but enjoying the time spent together and also apart.  It was a mixture of laughter, tantrums, and quiet time.  It was wonderful waking up to the kids for so many days in a row.  I will never tire of this.   I will never tire of the mornings waking up to the kids and their smiles and their funny words.  It was great to have my mom here.  To share this time with us in such a relaxed way; no plans, no schedules, just doing what we want to do.

Highlights of the Rest of Today:

  • After dropping off Nana, I decided to take the kids to a science museum at a local university.  They loved it.  It was a totally spontaneous trip but they were great.   We played with air and beachballs, balls on ramps, the kids worked together to build foam building structures, … , …, …    They had so much fun.
  • We had lunch, the Twins took naps.
  • Big Bro and Red went next door to play with their friends.
  • I did some more cleaning up around the house.  I did laundry.
  • The Twins woke up and I put on loud music and the three of us danced in the kitchen.
  • A friend came over for dinner and we had a HUGE pasta dinner with chocolate mousse cake afterwards.  We sang “Happy First day of First Grade” to the birthday song tune; The kids were great.
  • We had a photo shoot of the kids to celebrate Big Bro’s first day of first grade.
  • Red wrote out her alphabet letters but kept having a problem with the letter “K”.  I showed her a trick and she wound up doing the “K” perfectly and was very proud of her accomplishment for the entire alphabet, as was I.   Her creation made it to the “art wall” in our kitchen.
  • The kids all went to sleep without a problem.
  • I got myself ready for tomorrow morning…. I will be driving Big Bro to his first day of 1st grade, and also the kids to their daycares.  We will need to leave VERY early to get there on time.  I got the shoes ready, lunch is already made for Big Bro, and the ride is ready for the kids breakfast in the van on the way there.    Wish me luck.

I am sighing now because I feel like its the end but yet a new beginning.  Big Bro in first grade; I can’t believe it.  I wanted so much to be settled for our family for years before Big Bro made it to first grade… there was so much pressure leading up to this event…. and here we are.  Still in the same general location, but our family torn.   It really is amazing.

I feel happy though.   I am settled, but still not really.  So much to do to actually get settled (fence, yard, garden, etc. etc. etc.) but all the rest will just unfold.  There is no rush for anything.   No timeline for anything.   Just living.   Each day.   And I feel good with where I am now.   There is no resistance with anything anymore.  I feel good with the time that I get to spend with the kids.   I feel lucky that I have the time to focus on them when I do have time with them.   I feel good that they listen to me as their mother – we laugh together, but they listen and they are fun for me to be around.   I enjoy being with them.  Talking with them.  Watching them learn.  Watching them care for each other and for other things, like their rooms, Cocoa, the house – our home.

This was a great “staycation” and a vacation that has topped the charts in my mind.   I’m looking forward to many more to come.

Have a great week everybody –

– Mama K

Random Thought: Biggest bargain office ever?

It’s a Monday. A day without the children. I usually would do daily journals capturing the transitions between being a mom and working, and then working and being a mom again. Since my separation/divorce, these daily journals just don’t make much sense anymore so I am changing up my normal routine.

Last night after I dropped the kids off, I decided to go shopping. I knew where I was going. IKEA.

Remember those days of dorm living? Remember those days after college when you got a place of your own? Remember the deals and steals at IKEA? The particle-board furniture that looked pretty damn good?

Well, I went to IKEA last night. And believe it or not, I bought an ENTIRE room of office furniture for me and the kids for get this…. $526 including sales tax. This included: one computer workstation, two sets of drawers, one double-desk, two single desks, and four little white stools for the little ones. So I get my office, plus the four kids get their OWN desks and chairs for homework (Big Bro) and “work” (aka creative arts) for the other ones! I’m so excited!!!! And hopefully it will look good/reasonable/passable…. oh I’ll just through some plants around and cute drapes and I’m sure it will be fine.



Now the hard part…. getting the OLD stuff out (conference room table that is HUGE and heavy, two filing cabinet drawers that are HUGE and heavy) and the new stuff built…. I just brought all the boxes from my car to the house and almost tore my voice-box out when one of the boxes slammed from my step into my throat. Now I sound like Demi Moore.

Wish me luck with the Swedish wrench tool.

Where are you finding unbelievable steals/deals to prepare for the next school year????

Til tomorrow –
– Mama K

May 21: What a difference 7 years makes

Monday… a first day of the work-week after an AMAZING weekend with the kids at my new house. And May 21. The anniversary of my marriage that is currently being dissolved…

Highlights of the Morning:

  • Twin Crazy went nuts when she saw me. Hugs and slaps on the back. “Mommy!!! Mommy!!! Mommy!!!!”. She kept slapping away and dancing and jumping in my arms. How sweet.
  • Twin Husky pointed on his head for me to kiss him. I remember him pointing and touching Red’s chair with his foot – like he was teasing her but not really. When I asked him to do it some more so I could take a picture, he gave me a dirty look. Too cute. Then he started making faces at me – puckering up his lips and acting silly. We were all laughing.
  • Red woke up cranky – likely due to two days with no naps. We are short on her favorite breakfast foods so that was also a problem today. I need to go food shopping.
  • The kids tried Rice Krispies (my favorite cereal – I love it on top of ice-cream) and they were interested in the snap crackle pop but not that interested in the actual cereal.
  • Big Bro was EXCELLENT. He got changed, ate breakfast, and was ready to ride with the Motley Crew.
  • Twin Crazy became very cranky since she was never changed out of her diaper this morning… it was all wet and I took it off and then she ran away from me with her pajamas and underwear down by her knees… walking around naked and laughing.
  • I helped Big Bro with his shoes, and Red with her clothes.
  • I dropped off Red and let them know that she missed her naps this weekend so might be tired. I also let them know that she saw Mommy’s house and the CHICKENS so they could have something to talk about.
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    I sat on the ferry and talked with a neighbor the whole way. Talked about the weekend, his BBQ, his kids, my house, the kids’ reactions to the house. The fact that I would love to see him and his family come out for a visit. They are my only real connection in my current neighborhood and I will miss them. They’ve really done a lot for me over the past year and I appreciate them so much.

    Highlights of my Working Day:

  • As soon as I walked in, I was hit with a client deliverable that needed to be reviewed first thing in the AM for delivery to the client ASAP. I spent about 2 hours on it and we sent it off by noon.
  • I grabbed an amazing won-ton and noodle soup. It was freezing today.
  • I crafted a letter to close out a separate project. I’ll be glad when both of these client projects are over.
  • I did a lot of administrative items – also mapping out what I need to do with my “real” job now that my client work is finally [almost] over.
  • I had to leave a bit early to catch my doctor appointment tonight. Time went by so fast… I was talking about so much. There is a lot for me to talk about and I really don’t have anyone out here to talk to – it’s amazing how my mutual friends have just gone silent – they are keeping their distance. I have few friends out here from my past and they are supportive. I talk to my family daily but they get so frustrated at the situation and they are a bit behind the acceptance curve that I am on. I have already accepted so much and they are not quite there with me yet. This whole process is so unbelievably frustrating and such a waste of time/money. And it does NO good for the families or the children involved. I hate the way this divorce is going and I would have done things so differently if possible.
  • Dinner and Bedtime:
    My ferry is coming in now, it is 8 PM. I am going to go straight to Trader Joe’s to pick up food for the kids. I will likely miss the kids tonight since the older ones are REALLY wiped out. I have a lot of work to do tonight related to the divorce. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! HA. What a joke.

    Til tomorrow –
    – Mama K

    p.s., I bought bags of breakfast stuff at Trader Joes. That will likely be my last trip at Trader Joes for food at this house. Co-parent will have to do it from here on out while they are his house.

    The older kids were still awake when I got home. I got lots of hugs and Red sat on my lap. Both wanted me to spend time with them and scratch their backs. Big Bro told me that I smelled bad. Was it the fish tacos with onions? I asked him if it was my breath or my body. He didn’t know. I asked if I should brush my teeth or take a shower. He said “both”. Great.

    The twins were also talking in their rooms so I said hello to them. Twin Husky was lifting his arms to hug me. Twin Crazy was standing up swinging her head from side to side. I asked them if they wanted me to sing and they of course said Yes. I got them out of their cribs and they each sat in my lap, one head to each of my shoulders. I said I would sing “Twinkle Twinkle” three times and then it was back to their cribs. I rocked and sang with them and enjoyed my brief time with them. They are so good. They went off to their cribs with smiles. “I…… love….. you…..” in whispers. Sweet dreams my babies.

    April 12: The never-ending day

    Long day, but nice day with Twin Crazy and Twin Husky. Even though the week before my big meetings…. I couldn’t get their daycare provider today but it was a good thing; it gave me time to play with them since I will be away all of next week.

    Highlights of the Morning:

    • I had some cuddle time with Twin Husky
    • Red showed me one of her drawings and we put it on the clip-wall hanging in my room. She was excited to see her art displayed and enjoyed looking at the other pieces of art and pictures that were clipped up there.
    • Big Bro rode his bike to school and I took the Twins in the stroller. Twin Crazy was wearing her rainboots. Twin Husky wanted to bring sidewalk chalk.
    • At home, Twin Crazy had a poop accident so we had to change her clothes. She enjoyed walking around the house in just her underwear. So Twin Husky decided to strip down too and was walking around in only his diaper.
    • We did laundry together. Putting a load in, watching the water fill, watching it turn and do its work. Taking the clean clothes out, putting them in the dryer together. And then starting a new load. Me handing them a pile of clothes, and them putting the pieces into the washer. They really enjoy that. I found a flashlight in the washer – glad I looked before I put any soap in. Twin Husky wanted to fold the clothes too which was cute. Him rolling up the clothing in a ball and putting it on top of a pile and patting it down. So cute.
    • We ate, played, tickled.
    • While they played I tried to get some work done. Mostly emails to keep things moving. There was one or two conference calls that were comical since I had two boisterous toddlers on my hands.
    • Twins were fighting over sitting on a tin canister. Twin Crazy is very aggressive. I have to watch what they do because she bullies him.
    • They had fun playing with water when eating their lunch. They’re having issues with water-play during food time that I do not like.
    • When they napped, I worked: finishing touches on Agendas, reaching out to confirm and get more info from speakers, looking at presentations, confirming attendee lists. I also had to get an analyst set up to populate a presentation for me… I will need to look and work on that tonight.
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    The Rest of the Day:

    • Twins woke up and ate oatmeal for a snack.
    • We went to pick up Red – Twin Husky wanted to sit in Big Bro’s carseat, and Twin Crazy was in Red’s. They were having so much fun. Red’s pickup was fast. Big Bro rode his bike home, along the lagoon. He took the other way around our our house and I drove slowly so he could beat us there.
    • We went food shopping for Red’s Green Smoothie ingredients. They were having a great time picking out other food items and helping me put things into plastic bags. Big Bro tried to sneak in a big package of cup-cakes. They were all well behaved.
    • At home I had a roast cooking; so it was play-time. Tickle-time. The kids decided to give each other manicures and pedicures.
    • After dinner we had smoothies. They all helped to put in the ingredients and liked the treat with their straws.
    • We sat down to some TV, cuddled, and Twin Husky pumped on sugar wanted to push the rocking chair that we were sitting on.
    • I had bedtime with Big Bro and Red. I read a book where there was reference to a princess that had died. Big Bro said that it made him feel sad. I was surprised that he was talking that way since his teachers have told us that he doesn’t share his feelings. I’m happy that he’s talking like that with me. We’ve been working together on “feelings” and it’s making me feel better that we can start to talk like this.
    • There was thunder and lightening. They were asking a lot of questions. Big Bro passed out without a problem. Red was trickier, but I said it was OK to feel scared and that she was doing great and almost 1/2 asleep already. I’m downstairs typing on the desktop since I locked myself out of my room – co-parent is upstairs in the hallway and she is quiet.
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    My locksmith just left; I am now able to get back into my room and get to my computer. Now the third shift starts. I need to get some presentations finished.

    Til tomorrow –

    – Mama K

    February 20: Ending the 3-day weekend

    The end of a 3-day weekend – bittersweet in many ways. Weekends are hard for me these days so 3 days makes it tough to get excited about. Today was a good day though –

    • I woke up early and continued laundry; the kids were up so I grabbed all the sheets for the last load of the week. I love the smell of fabric softener. I find it comforting.
    • All kids were up and sitting across on the couch getting ready for some T.V. Thankfully, Big Bro did not buy any movies. I still can’t believe he knows how to do this now. Then 3 of the kids broke out the funny animal hats and started playing with each other and pretending they were birds, dogs, ducks…. so cute.
    • I made a huge pancake breakfast; got the kids dressed; played a bit.
    • I took Big Bro and Red out for the morning. We just did some shopping – Big Bro needed some shoes and I needed a laundry bag. Both kids were GREAT with these activities. Big Bro originally wanted shoes with pictures on them or ones that lit up, but he’s in a size now for bigger kids and the shoes don’t really have those styles. He picked out a decent pair of black and bright yellow sneakers. He likes them. They both helped me at Bed Bath and Beyond for a laundry bag, and even saved me money since they both picked the cheapest one. I’m watching what I’m spending like a hawk now since I have to. I never thought I would go backwards in my standard of living but now it is inevitable so I’m changing behaviors definitely now.
    • At home, all kids were re-united and Big Bro initiated an activity for them all. He brought out markers and stickers and paper and had everyone on the floor creating art. I loved watching them and thought it was great that Big Bro took the initiative like that and that they were all sharing stickers and helping each other with caps, pulling the stickers off the sheets, etc.
    • Made lunch at home; kids napped in clean sheets.
    • They woke up and I gave them baths and showers. I love the smell and feel of clean kids. I love how they cuddle up to you. I cut 80 fingernails and toenails, my weekly ritual.
    • I made home-made pizza for them for dinner – Trader Joe’s has pre-made doughs that I keep in the freezer. Afterwards we had ice-cream. And watched TV. Big Bro played a Spongebob 2x since I didn’t watch it with him appropriately the first time. He really notices if I am watching it with him. He likes to do things with me and if I am distracted even sitting next to him is not good enough. So I paid attention the second time around, and made sure to comment throughout the show so we were talking about what happened.
    • Bedtime for the Twins tonight. I get Big Bro and Red tomorrow night. This didn’t work out well for Big Bro and Red. They were both crying and clinging to me. Big Bro more so than Red. He is very attached and this forced separation while I am still in the house will be difficult for us. I need to talk to our Child Custody mediator about this. Maybe/hopefully it will get easier for him during the week. Even Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were consoling him tonight after he barged into their room while I was sitting with them reading a book.
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    So, the 3-day weekend is over, I survived. We divided and I had good fun with both groups of kids; attended a birthday party, went to the zoo, and did normal day-to-day routine things with the kids.

    Red is asking when she will be able to share a room with Twin Crazy – a “girl” room – I reply “someday soon” and cannot wait to be painting a room pink for my little girls. I have to be patient and know that soon that day will come. It will just be tough getting there.

    Til tomorrow –

    – Mama K


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