June 11: Running towards the end or the beginning?

A sunny Monday, after a great weekend and extra days with my mother at my new house.   The day so far has been good.

Highlights of the Morning and Commute:

  • I woke up on the couch.  All of my bedroom has been moved over to my new house.  So the couch was my bed.  I showered the night before so woke up at 7 AM and got ready in record time.
  • Twin Husky and Twin Crazy were still sleeping when I got to their room.  Butts in the air – I love that position of toddlers/young kids.
  • Red and Big Bro were likewise still slumbering.  Big Bro was completely hidden under his covers except for his one leg and foot.  Red was bundled up and her face reminded me of when she was a baby… all scrunched up and lips pouting.
  • Twins woke up in great moods; I wish I could say the same about Red.   Co-parent started to take her things downstairs but she was thrown into a fit over something.  I tried to calm her but it took awhile.  I saw her baby on her bed and I think the issue was that her “stuff” was not taken downstairs as a collective package.  Once I grabbed her baby and her blanket, she calmed down, and took my hand to go downstairs.  She has become quite a handful.  She has always had trouble using her words when she is angry – and now at four years old her tantrums are becoming fierce.
  • She sulked downstairs over her chair, her clothes, her EVERYTHING.
  • The rest of the kids ate well; Twin Husky and Twin Crazy wanted to be held.
  • I packed up Twin clothes for daycare and got the rest of the kids things by the door.
  • Big Bro was getting ready for his last day as “leader” of the Motley Crew bike ride – this is his last week of school.
  • After everyone left, I was with Red, alone.  She happily got changed, happily went over to her seat, and happily ate her cereal.   She needs to be handled very carefully these days.  Her drop off was fine – she was clingy, but went to her teacher.

The ferry ride to the city was fine; it was sunny and I was talking with a neighbor.  My work is not that busy right now so I am not feeling stress on that front.  There are things for me to do but none are time-critical right now.  But that can be a problem sometimes.  I need to set my own deadlines when work gets like this – otherwise I get lazy and nothing gets done.

This is my last week living in this house.  The last week of Big Bro’s school.  The last week of our dysfunctional family lives as we currently know it.

Highlights of My Working Day:

  • It felt good to be in the office.  I missed some important meetings last week on my days off so I got caught up with a colleague.
  • I ramped up planning for one of the forums:   sent out “Save the Date” emails to the members, and also started the outreach for speakers for that meeting in Fall.   I also asked my admin to schedule a planning meeting with a subset of members for planning purposes – I already have the agenda set so am hoping to get this meeting complete soon so I can get things accomplished.
  • I started to think through sales efforts for the above forum.
  • We need to change the date for another forum I am working on.  It is a big conference week in the location we are looking at so the original dates will not work.  I need to make sure that our proposed revised date does not have any conflicts before reaching out to our members…
  • I had a fantastic lunch and enjoyed walking outside in the warm weather
  • I spent time going through admin items – clearing out emails and also going through some personal items.

I am on the ferry now and it is bittersweet.  One of my last times in the afternoon picking up all the kids.   My time here is ending and I hoped to be moving on with my husband.   I wish things could have worked differently but they did not.  I was hoping to experience this transition with him – honestly I was.   So now I face this week by myself.  And my children are in the middle.  And I wish it could have been different.

I feel happier, but lonelier, and also wondering if things will be OK for the kids.  I feel the need for positive reinforcement.   I know they will be better for me – anything will be better compared to 2011.   I recently read a quote “sometimes things have to fall apart for better things to come together.”  I am hoping that is the case for me and my family.

Dinner and Bedtime:

  • Pickups were great.  Red ran into me and grabbed my leg like there was no tomorrow.  Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were jumping up and down as my van pulled up.  They were jumping with such gusto that I laughed out loud.  Twin Husky needed to run off extra energy before getting into the van.  Big Bro was happy to get his bike but wanted it loaded into the van.
  • Red was crying because of a hurt finger.  Once she got a band-aid on it she was fine.
  • Red and Big Bro were lobbying for boxed mac-n-cheese.  I said “no way”.   Twin Crazy found two boxes hidden behind our rocking chair later that night.
  • I started dinner and threw in some laundry.   The kids were playing.  I then read Twin Crazy a book.  She asked me to read it again and again.  I think I went four times until the dinner was ready.
  • We ate.  I did more laundry.  I started to pack up some of the kids’ toys for my house.
  • I was with Twin Crazy and Twin Husky tonight.  Big Bro was upset.  He said he wished that he could switch back and forth between being himself and Twin Husky that way I could read to him every night.  I told him that I love him no matter what though.  He said he knew that.  I said “seriously” while looking into his eyes.  I need for him to know that he is loved no matter where I am and no matter where he is.  He knows this.


So I’m now sitting in an empty bedroom, listening to my laundry spin.  I’m packing up some last items.   I’m getting ready for a drive to my house first thing in the AM to accept a furniture delivery and also get my TV installed.  I bet I won’t be able to get any work done so I think I should just take the day off.   I will try to get Internet installed tomorrow AM (by myself – they sent me a kit) so that hopefully I can try to be a bit productive.  If I can’t get anything done I will just take off.

I’m feeling good, I think.  The transition is finally happening this week.  I spent 5 ½ months living in the same house as co-parent while going through a divorce process.  While listening to my children cry at night.  While standing by and forcing myself to stay out of his parenting.   While trying to work with 3rd parties but not being heard; while fighting financial aspects (much less important to me) and also child custody aspects – the latter ripping my heart out in the process.   I’ve come to accept a lot through this time; things that I took for granted I’ve had to fight for and be rejected.  I’ve even fought with my own lawyers.    But again – things sometimes have to fall apart for better things to come together.   I can only keep thinking that as I finally move from this house.   As things get better for me it will get tougher for my kids – I know this.   But the most important thing, I believe, is that they FEEL loved and that I know I can give to them.

Til tomorrow –

–          Mama K

June 6 & 7: Thank goodness Nana is here

I missed yesterday’s daily journal posting.  Sorry.  Really.  I’ve just been a bit crazed lately.  Moving.  The arrival of my mom (YEAH!!).  So I fell asleep just before typing it out.  Sorry again.  So I’ll recap the last two days.

Wednesday was a 1/2 work day for me.  I remember being busy.  Sending out lots of emails and sales outreach for a forum we are trying to launch.  Getting conference calls set up.  I was very productive.   I was also excited about the day ahead.   My mom was flying in for a couple of days.  I was excited to see her and show her the new house.  I need some reinforcement in my life (and help with the move) so was glad for her visit.

After work I picked up Big Bro.  We went to Toyota to get some floor mats installed.  Now the car REALLY looks good.   Big Bro was excited about the free bottles of water and the granola bar snacks.  I was excited about the Starbucks coffee.   After that, we went to pick up Twin Crazy and Twin Husky.   We then went to Red’s daycare.  I had a short conference with her “teacher” which went well.  She is right on track.  While I was doing the conference the 3 other kids played.   Afterwards we picked up Red and then headed to the airport.  My mom arrived just as we did – great timing!   We headed out to the new house and the kids were all talking and telling Nana about it.  About the chickens, their new rooms, the planting, and their new friends.  They were all excited.

As soon as we got there the kids wanted to show Nana their rooms.  So cute.   Then of course we took the trek up to see the chickens.  Red was following one around that was cruising in our back yard.   We did some lawn watering, talked with the neighbors, and got my mom settled.  Before you knew it I had to get the kids back — I had co-parent order a pizza; poor Big Bro fell asleep in the car and didn’t wake up for dinner. 



I woke up and started to dismantle my bed.  The kids were enthralled.   The rest of the morning was uneventful, I think.  I played with the kids and felt good.

Big Bro went to school on his bike.  I took the rest of the kids to my house.  I couldn’t believe my eyes.  The place looked incredible.  My mom was up until 1:30 AM the prior night (4:30 AM east coast time after flying all day!!!) cleaning and organizing my kitchen.   The place was really straightened up everywhere else.  Boxes were stacked and there were clear paths to walk.  Whew.  Thank goodness my mom is here.

We spent the day eating, organizing clothes, finishing the kitchen, clearing a path to the chickens, picking up Big Bro, accepting package deliveries from Amazon/UPS and FedEx, receiving my shed, almost receiving my washer/dryer (I need to reorder — GAS dryer…. damn it), getting AT&T to install a phone jack, getting ADT to install a security system….. more playing, more eating, …. we went out to dinner and all kids ate like champs.  Then they started acting crazy so we fled.

I left my mom at the house to enjoy peace and quiet.   She looked exhausted.   She was thinking about more work with kids clothes but I really hope she hit the sack instead.

Once we got home the kids went to bed and I went to Home Depot.   It is amazing the $$$ you can spend there.  I have to cut myself off soon.  I think I should be good to stay clear away from there for awhile (I hope).

I got home and showered.  It was badly needed.  I smelled like ass.  I mean, I actually smelled myself so you know it was bad.  I hadn’t showered in 2 days and essentially was wearing the same clothes so it was really, really, bad.  I’m now typing this freshly showered, body very sore, with wet hair.  I love the smell of my skin right now.   I’m really happy.   Things are coming together and I love my house.  I love the space.  I love the yards.  I love the neighborhood.  I love how it looks, how it smells, and how it is mine.   And how my mom approves of it (at least she says).   Yes it is small but it is all that we need.   And it is beautiful.  And we are making it a home.   And I can’t wait to get there tomorrow to start another day there.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

June 4: Rain, rain go away

A rainy Monday.   After an amazing weekend with the kids, in duos.   Last night when I came back with Twin Husky and Twin Crazy, the reunion with Red and Big Bro was fun – lots of chatter and banter.   The children miss each other when they are away, but I can also tell that they like the more attention that separation from their siblings brings.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • All of the kids were still snoozing past 7:10 AM.  Quite unusual.  I guess that’s what good baths and full weekends do; plus rainy Monday mornings.
  • Twin Husky looked confused when he got up; Twin Crazy was immediately playful.  Playing hide-and-seek, talking, laughing, … what a difference in personalities
  • I dressed Twin Crazy and got rid of her “dirty stinky diaper” – she’s regressed with potty training which is understandable with the changes in her life right now.
  • Red was waking up slowly; her hair all over the place but clean.  When her eyes were finally focused, she woke up and out of bed just fine.  Fixing her sheets, and asking (demanding) me to gather her things (backpack, baby, seal animal, jacket…..).  This is our routine together.  Me and her joking about all of her stuff.
  • Big Bro got up without a problem.  He wanted to bring his “bad guy” Legos to school today and bring his “good guy” Legos tomorrow.  
  • The kids were all laughing about a small rubber chicken keychain toy that Big Bro pulled apart.  You can now see a hole in it and they were laughing about the “chicken’s butt”.
  • The kids were walking around on tippy toes which I thought was cute.
  • Big Bro wanted to tell me about rainy days at school and what they do at recess if its raining.  How they watch movies instead and how today he hopes that it rains all day so he can watch two movies.
  • Red wanted me to help her find her favorite clothes in the dryer.   She was happy.
  • Big Bro needed help finding clean socks.  We went “fishing” together for clean socks out of the dryer. 
  • I started a load of wash and then we were off.  Big Bro rode today with the Motley Crew.   I packed up Twin Crazy and Twin Husky.   Red wanted to go too and was upset.  I said I would pick her up from school today.   It’s hard to hear their cries when they can’t come with me.  If it were up to me I would take all of them.

I’m on the ferry and it is gray.   I have certain things that I want to focus on for work to prepare for the Fall forums and also turn to sales for new memberships.    I also need to attend an internal meeting related to these forums with a Director from another office that I’m not excited about.  He will likely play a larger role in my forums since the Director that is involved with them now is retiring at the end of the year.   This other Director is moving in and managing him will be a challenge.

I also need to organize some things for home:   order a garbage bin, call to check on Batman (the sick guinea pig), order service to hook up my TV and run wires for surround-sound.   Follow up with the fence and hand-rail project.  Confirm schedules for Custody Evaluation.   I think that’s it on a personal front. 

Highlights of My Working Day:

  • I decided to buy a HUGE breakfast sandwich as I was dodging the cold rain to the office. 
  • I got through a ton of emails and sent out an invoice for our project which just ended. 
  • I received word that our client that requested a high-level proposal checked internally and they do not need our help at this time.  🙂
  • I went through some financials of the forums we are running to see how profitable they are; and also thought through approach for sales
  • We had an internal meeting where we talked about the accounting and how to standardize some of the work that we do with the forums; also an approach to reach more prospects to generate new members.

The day went by quickly but I feel like I did not accomplish much of anything.    Hopefully tomorrow I’ll feel more productive.

Dinner and Bedtime:

  • I was so exhausted on the ferry home that I did not write but instead slept.  I am drained.
  • I picked everyone up and was surprised to see Twin Husky in a brand new outfit – cute little jeans (with pockets) and a collar polo shirt.   Their daycare provider purchased it for him; he looked so handsome and even repeated that over and over.  He loves the pockets.
  • I got home and started to boil water for pasta.  As this was going, I started to break down cardboard boxes to recycle, related to my move.  The kids were all outside playing and the neighbors were out there too so it was nice.  I enjoyed myself but found I was running into the street WAY to much to fetch their balls.  
  • Dinner was fast and the kids ate well.
  • All were fighting and cranky so we started bedtime earlier; I had the younger ones but the older ones wanted to be with me; co-parent was completely frustrated.  I dressed the younger ones, read to the older ones, sang to the younger ones, and am in bed now. 


My plan for tonight was to start dismantling my bed.  I just don’t know if I’ll be able to start this project.   I can also do the curtains so I might just do that instead.   Red is now crying and I just can’t take this.  I cannot wait until June 15th when I can be free from this sterile house and remnants of lost hopes and dreams.   I’ve completely let go and need to move on and staying here through the end of the school year is really hard.   I can’t wait until the 15th when I can start to breathe again.   I’m missing my house and I want to be there.  And be there with the kids in their laughter and fits of cranky rage.   And of course, the weeds.

Til tomorrow –

Mama K

Staying Sane: Just make a list and bang it out

For those that are following this blog, you know that I have more on my plate now than 1) working; and 2) being a mother.   I’ve also got 3) a move; 4) a divorce; and 5) child custody efforts.   I separate # 5 from #4 because dealing with the kids, their emotions, and the thought of these descisions into the future are soooooooooooooooo critical; money and things can be replaced (e.g., divorce); but the relationships and the safety net you provide to your children are just too important to overlook.  So I need to give that the special focus it deserves.

Anyway, the topic of this post.   How to manage all of the things going on right now…. how to keep it together without falling to pieces or feeling like a deer in headlights.  Well, I do feel like that sometimes.  But then my Type A personality kicks in and I just hunker down, focus, make my lists, and bang them out.   You can probably tell that I am a big “list maker” just by the way that I write.  Most of the time, I do this work at night.  After the kids go to sleep.   And online.   I cut corners and probably sacrifice cost to save me time.  I do not have time to bargain-shop when I have so much to get finished.

For example, in the last say 2 weeks, I’ve had to:

  • buy a minivan
  • sell a car
  • start my move
  • buy two bedroom sets for two rooms for the four children (and put together said furniture….)
  • buy a refrigerator
  • buy a washer / dryer
  • buy a kitchen set
  • buy a livingroom set
  • buy a shed
  • organize a fence/handrail installation
  • deal with court deadlines and paperwork deadlines
  • deal with a summer custody schedule that is ambiguous in some of its language
  • deal with back and forth between lawyers on said ambuiguity
  • fight with lawyer/ terminate relationship with said lawyer on dealings with said ambuiguity
  • lead a selling webinar for a forum at work that we are trying to launch
  • finish a client project and complete a Final Deliverable for our client
  • weed, weed, weed, weed, weed the grounds of the new house; I mowed a lawn for the very first time ever
  • buy things I never imagined I would ever own (e.g., electric drill) at Home Depot – make multiple trips to home depot
  • Start to think about financial mediation and then put that on backburner

I am not saying that I am super human.  I am not.  And I am floundering in many of the above.   But what I am trying to do is compartmentalize the aspects of my life that require ACTION.  And also figure out which of the items NEED to get done IMMEDIATELY versus which can wait a bit.  Which involve 3rd parties?  Which have deadlines?  Which do I need to work together with someone else versus what can I do on my own?  What can be accomplished at night, on-line, and executed through on-line shopping and delivery to my house?    Are there people who can help me (and YES there are and YES I take the help when offered, with MUCH appreciation).

And all along all of this is focusing also on my kids.  This must be hard for them.  This must be confusing for them.  But they are troopers and handling it very well – better than I expected.  I guess having four children is great in that they help each other… they look out for each other… they are a bit stronger I suppose than children of smaller families.

And in the list there is the recurring theme of getting the house ready.  Inside and out.   And I find great pleasure in the outside work.  Mowing the lawn.  Weeding.  I joke about all of the weeds but I think it therapeutic for me to actually do it.   I find that attacking that earth in the early morning before it gets too hot is the best time.  It is quiet.  And I fill up those wheelbarrels and I have time to think about my to-do’s… or not.   And many times I have helpers and workers (AKA the kids) and also friends and neighbors.   THANK YOU EVERYONE.

So… the things left to do…

  • hire someone for fence/railings [NEED TO DO SOON]
  • put shed together [OUTSOURCE… FIND SOMEONE TO DO IT]
  • hire another lawyer [backburner for now….]
  • complete the move
  • get internet set up [installation set….]
  • get washer/dryer, furniture delivered in one piece [delivery dates set… ]
  • organize kitchen [Mom to help]
  • focus on getting some work done at the day job

Have a great week!

– Mama K

May 29: Getting ready to move on

It is 11:15PM right now and I want to recap of the day’s events –

– Chocolate Tuesday

– Twin Husky starting a “band” this morning with instrumentsImage


– Busy day at work dealing with forums and also client work; I wrote a client proposal and also a sales document for a forum we are launching as follow ups to the webinar we hosted 2 weeks back.   I essentially had my “sales” hat on today.

– Picked up kids; cooked dinner while packing up my mini-van with a load of stuff for my move

– Ate dinner; Twin Crazy was funny with upside-down sunglasses


– finished packing up van and 3 of the kids wanted to come with me.  I said they need to help and also take baths before leaving my house to come back home to go to sleep.  They agreed.  Big Bro and Twin Crazy held hands on the way.   We drove up to the house to find deer in our backyard.  The kids helped me unload the van – I gave them stuff and told them which room to put it in.  Big Bro helped to water the lawn.  I carried down garbage bins.   Girls took their baths first; Twin Crazy squealed when she went into her room with the decorations; Big Bro took his bath and then we were off.   Kids were asleep when I got back.



– I finished cleaning up from dinner; and then finished up some work.

So, yes it’s late.  Yes I ran non-stop today.  But it felt GREAT to be at the house and add things to the home like rugs and decorations.  The kids are doing so well.  They are listening so well and really respecting my “new” rules.   They are helping and seem excited.  Big Bro requested a calendar so that he and the rest could see which days are with Mommy and which days are with Daddy.   I love him so much it hurts.  

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

May 16: The chair

I worked a 1/2 day and from home today. I then spent an hour or so at my NEW home and made it back in enough time to pick all of the kids up early. I was solo tonight and looking forward to spending this time with them.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • The Twins were ready to stroller to Big Bro’s school. We talked about grass-seed and new grass growing as we were waiting for the other kids to get ready. Big Bro was in the pack and enjoying his new bike. I went in to talk to his teacher and tell her about our discussion from last weekend about “Two Homes”. She looked upset/concerned. She was glad that I told her. I said there were no tears but lots of questions so he really doesn’t “get it” yet. I let her know that we were going to take the kids to see the house this weekend and that it might start to sink in more then. She said she would be on the lookout for any issues. She said that he mentioned two houses this week so I know it is on his mind.
  • I dropped the Twins off at their daycare and both looked good. Even Twin Crazy. They both have a routine where they take off their shoes in a certain spot. I helped Twin Husky unzipper his jacket [sortof] by himself. I walked back home with the empty stroller feeling a bit empty myself.
  • As soon as I got home I loaded up the van with as many boxes as I could fit. I need to get to the house today since I have a TON of stuff arriving and don’t want the things sitting outside for too many days.
  • My doorbell rang and it was my neighbor with an AWESOME wooden rocking chair that she wanted to get rid of. I was completely looking for something like this — I’ve always loved front porches — the kinds in the south that are sweeping around the houses… well, my front porch is REALLY small but I do have flat yard that runs along the front. And in the afternoon, the shade kind of hits the house in a way that it feels like there is a front porch. So I put the rocking chair right out front in the mulch. It may look silly to some, but I love it. It is completely overlooking the view of the front yard – and I imagine myself sitting there while the kids are playing in the front. I hope we spend time out there – it makes the house inviting to the neighbors and helps me to transform the house into a home.
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    Highlights of My Working Day:

  • I had a conference call with a previous client to “really” close out the work this time.
  • I started to re-work the discussion document from our big meeting yesterday — adding in some content and highlighting things that were discussed on the call.
  • I had an internal call related to the forums that I help to manage. We have a lot of sales efforts going on through these forums that I feel good about. We have some work to do but all is manageable. I took the call on the road and also had some of the call as I was unpacking the shipping boxes from Amazon.
  • Highlights of the Rest of the Day:

  • I pulled up to the house and OMG there are WEEDS EVERYWHERE. The multiple terraces of mulch are now over-run by weeds. OMG. How long is it going to take me to pull these suckers? And how fast will they grow back? Will it be like plucking those pesky hairs from my chin, face, and eyebrows? A never-ending project? Will I need to go to Amazon now and find a wide brimmed hat, super heavy-duty gloves, and a wheelbarrel????????
  • I unpacked lots of shipping boxes: one bunkbed (in parts), 4 mattresses, 4 barstools, a Blue-Ray DVR plus sound system, a landline telephone system. I’m excited. I filled up my NEW recycling bin. Pickup days are Wednesdays so I just missed it!!!
  • I unpacked some moving boxes with some pictures – I put them up but unfortunately they are only of Big Bro and Red… and they are old. They were all packed up from when we moved to our “temporary” house two years ago. So I feel the need to get some pictures up of Twin Husky and Twin Crazy so that they can see themselves too when they first visit the house.
  • I disassembled the bunk bed box in my driveway and brought the bed inside in parts. Otherwise I never would have been able to drag the whole box inside. I thought of Big Bro as I was carrying in the pieces labeled “A”, “M”, etc. I thought it’s just like a Lego set. I wonder if he would be interested in helping me put the beds together….
  • I decided to start on a bar-stool project. I opened up a box to discover that you don’t need any “real” tools…. its the hand tool/wrench thing that it comes with so I had what I needed to get started. Assembling these will be easy. It’s important for me to have SOMETHING ready and set up for the kids when they see the house for the first time. I figured the four bar stools would be a good thing for them to see… to relate to. I made it through 1/2 way of my first stool when I received a phone call…
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  • Twin Crazy still had a fever and was upset. She needed me. I quickly locked up the house and headed straight for daycare. I held her for a bit and she calmed down immediately. She said she was sick in a meek voice. Twin Husky looked fine. I took them to the drug store to buy more Ibuprophen and Tylenol. I asked them if they wanted to go right home or get the rest of the kids. They wanted their siblings. So we picked up Red and Big Bro too.
  • It was like a chinese fire-drill with everyone in different seats. It was cute. I looked back and Twin Crazy was holding hands across the van with Big Bro. I love seeing things like this. Big Bro and Red used to do this several years ago when Red was a baby/toddler. I’ve always thought it amazingly cute. Big Bro is such a proud Big brother and although he does have his occasions of being mean, he really is good to them the majority of the time.
  • At home we played a bit. I was waiting to cook dinner for co-parent. Then the kids told me that he was leaving for the airport straight from work. So I started the dinner. There was a request for mac-n-cheese, chicken nuggets, and carrots. I obliged since Twin Crazy seemed interested in that. Big Bro and Red helped me make dinner. They all ate EXTREMELY well – even Twin Crazy, considering.
  • After dinner I played “wall ball” with Big Bro while the 3 others were upstairs playing quietly. Suddenly, they came downstairs and apparently they were playing “dress up” — the twins were in matching frilly dresses (pink and blue) and Red came down laughing her ass off. They were all loving the attention and Twin Husky was SERIOUSLY liking the dress. It did feel great. Not crinkly/itchy at all. It felt soft and frilly. He loved it.
  • Then the little ones played some games together while I sat with Big Bro watching a movie.
  • I started bed routine with the Twins. They love the book “The Hairy Toe”. Each knows the words. They were both reciting the book to me as I read it. I make it scary which they love. I tried to get them down but they did not want to go to bed earlier than Big Bro/Red. So we had some ups and downs and at one point I had two twins in my lap, Big Bro laying across my feet, and Red taking care of Twin Crazy as I was singing “Twinkle Twinkle”. The Twins wanted “more” singing and the bigger kids wanted me to STOP singing (I don’t blame them). Red put her hand over my mouth and I was over-garbling the words on purpose and they were all cracking up. Then I had 4 kids with hands on my mouth and they were all smiles. They eventually went to their beds. They are now all sleeping and there is no crying from upstairs at all.
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    I had a good night. I’m looking forward to my own space but am concerned about the kids and am hoping this weekend goes well. I’m hoping they will grow to be comfortable there even though it is new to them. I’m going to try my best to make it their space too and help them integrate into the neighborhood.

    We were talking tonight about Red joining us on our bike-ride to school tomorrow. I asked Big Bro first if he thought it was OK and if he would want her to join. He said yes. So I asked her about it and she’s excited. I’m looking forward to the morning with them.

    Til tomorrow –
    – Mama K

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