November 28: Lovely rain


Today was a good day of rain with me working from home and then reuniting with the kids.

  • Woke up to the rain; looked outside at the yard and the trees and fell in love with this house again
  • Got ready for work which meant comfy clothes and slippers.   Working by the fireplace with Cocoa who kept me company while she ate and played all day.
  • Work was good.  Conference calls.  Client follow ups.   A good day.

  • Went to pick up Red, Twin Crazy, and Twin Husky early because of a doctor appointment later that day.   Bad move.  All had interrupted naps which caused problems later.  BUT – the reunions were priceless.  I hugged Red for I think 5 minutes non-stop just outside of her classroom; Twin Husky woke up to see me and grabbed my nose and hugged me.  Twin Crazy couldn’t stop yelling “Mommy”, “Mommy”, “Mommy” even though I begged her to whisper since her other classmates were sleeping.
  • I took a conference call on the way, during, and after Big Bro’s pick up.   I love “mute”.
  • We went to the pediatrician for Big Bro’s wellness visit.  The kids played great in the waiting room.  Big Bro was awesome during the visit.  The doctor mentioned that he is doing really good at being dirty.   How embarrassing.
  • The kids got to pick from a trunk full of crap toys – these crap toys really caused me issues when we got home; kids were tired and cranky, and these crap toys I’m sure were made in China and self-destructed within 2 minutes of play.

  • When we got home Twin Husky helped me with the garbage bins (our thing together).   Red played with Cocoa.  Big Bro did 2 pages of math homework and then went out looking for friends.  No-one was home so he took a shower and then watched some TV as I made dinner.   Twin Crazy and Twin Husky by this point were acting crazy.  No naps kills us.
  • Dinner was fine; dessert was fruit
  • Afterwards I colored with Red, Big Bro played with Cocoa.  And the Twins were going nuts.
  • Booktime was fine; we read a book about divorce and in the story the kid looks up to the moon when he misses the other parent.  I said that’s what I do too…. in fact that’s what I did the night before.  The kids were intrigued by this.  I showed them the photograph that I took… a big, full moon with little clouds scattered everywhere that picked up the moonlight and actually looked like lace… I took a photo and showed it to them tonight.   I asked them that whenever they miss me at night they should look up to the moon because I am doing that too.  And whenever they miss me by day, they should look up to the sky because I am doing that too.

I wish it were that easy.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

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Staying Sane: Waiting is a bitch – be patient


I love my neighborhood.   It has a bunch of hard-working families with young kids like mine.  We tend to look out for each other.  We do care-packages for each other – for example, the family across the street received Twin Crazy’s hand-me down clothes.   And I receive hand-me-downs from a family down the street.   I’ve offloaded a flat-screen TV wall mount to a new family across the street – it didn’t work on my wall and I could not return it.   My next door neighbor gives us food from her garden and even gave us the corn seedlings that grew into the corn (that sucked).   This is just how it is here.

Last weekend, I received a care-package of bulbs for flowers that needed to be planted this month.  I was told how deep they were to go, and I picked out the flowers that I liked.  I’m really not a flower kind of person, but I thought they would actually look pretty good along the front hill of my property.  Plus, that would be a great spot for the neighbor who gave them to me to enjoy them herself.

So, I spent at LEAST 2 hours busy on Saturday morning figuring out where to plant them, pulling the mulch back, planting, sweating, planting, sweating, planting, sweating, roasting in the sun, planting, watering.    I must say that I felt pretty accomplished afterwards.

Later that day, the kids came over and the neighbors got together and all the kids playing in the street, riding bikes, kicking balls, etc.   I got to talking to the husband of the woman who gave me the bulbs.  I thanked him and told him I spent all day planting them, very proud of myself.

I asked him “so how long will it take for them to grow?”.  I was looking forward to seeing sprouts of green from my labor.   I was looking forward to having a front hill that looked GORGEOUS.   His reply shocked me.  Stunned me.  I think I almost shed a tear.  “Spring“.    Are you F*^(*&^ing kidding me??!??!??!?!?!?  SPRING?????!   HOW AM I GOING TO EVER BE ABLE TO WAIT THAT LONG FOR SPRING?   WHO PLANTS THINGS SO FAR IN ADVANCE ANYWAY?   DON’T YOU FORGET THAT THE STUFF IS THERE????????!

I really was not anticipating this answer.  I thought maybe 3 – 6 weeks.   Certainly not 6 months.   OMG.    UGGGGH!

I couldn’t help but see the parallels in being a working mother:

  • set expectations accordingly with your kids/coworkers.  This might stop a tantrum/conflict before it happens
  • don’t expect so much
  • don’t assume that your own expectations are the same as the other person’s (I need to see quick results, and cannot understand how anyone can enjoy bulbs that sprout six months later…)
  • have patience.   breathe in, breathe out.   Repeat.  breathe in, breathe out
  • Laugh it off; see the humor; laugh at yourself
  • still be thankful for what you receive
  • growing and nurturing take time; the seeds that you plant now (lessons with your children) may take time to manifest in their personalities.  Keep nurturing, teaching, believing even if it takes time to see the impact on the kids

Have any of you had experiences similar to this?  What other learnings can be observed from this or other situations you have encountered?

Thanks for listening; have a great week everyone

– Mama K

Random Thoughts: Creativity that calms


At our core, people are driven to create.

Image source:  BrainyQuote.com

I’ve often said to myself and others that having children is the best thing I have ever “did” in my life; in terms of doing something.  Creating something.  Bringing something to be that once was not.   I still believe this to be true.  I bet many of you do as well.  Creating our children is probably the ultimate. 

And then there is our work.  We create things there too.   For me, I create ideas out of information –  it is very abstract but it does come along with a lot of paper, PowerPoint presentations, and reports.    Some of you may be like me, working in an office “creating” services or products that you really can’t touch or feel.  Others of you may create actual, physical things.  

And then there is our down-time.  We may not have much of it.   You may have found that your free-time comes back as your children age.  I find that the baby / toddler years are very demanding but as the kids get older you get some of your time back.  But I’m finding myself with more and more of it lately for other reasons.

I’ve been spending a great deal of this time organizing and re-assembling because of my move.  But I’ve also been spending time tearing out my yard and yearning to build a garden.   To create food from the earth.  To see something grow.   To see plants flourish.  To see fruit form.   I guess you would say that this is my new hobby – but one that I’ve been thinking about for years.   For me, a part of the hobby is the relief and the physical part of tearing the weeds from the earth.  Ridding my property of infestation of “yucky stinky weeds” as the kids call them.  Taking something away that should not be.   But then fixing the earth so that good can grow.  I now have 4 trees that are planted in huge pots waiting for the right spots in the yard.  I have strawberry plants that are drooping from their weight.  I have corn stalks given to me by my neighbor.  I have raspberry and blackberry vines thriving.  I now also have a home full of houseplants – and I’m loving it.   It’s a great release for me at this point in my life – a combination of physical and mental energy – a combination of taking away the bad to make room for the good.   To create.   To create good for the family.

Which leads me to thinking… do you also find a cathartic calm from creating?   What is your channel for this creativity?  Please share!

Thanks for listening and sharing –

– Mama K

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