My journey as a Working Mother
The sun is shining the birds are singing and my babies are 3 today. I called them this morning and they were all giggling. I will be at co-parent’s tonight and am bringing cakes and balloons. I am thrilled today. They are growing into amazing people and I am so happy to be their mother.
Have a great day everyone!!!
Today was a good day at work. I had a face-to-face meeting with a client so was dressed up to impress. We had a good meeting. I had a good, productive, rest of the day.
But it was emotional for a part of the day. Today is co-parent’s birthday. I remember when he turned 40, I gave him 40 gifts (seriously) over a span of 1 week. This time last year however, he was preparing for divorce without my knowledge. And today, I am living apart from him in a different home and our four children are caught in the middle of so much. Tonight was their night with him – so he had the opportunity to celebrate with his kids.
We have been fighting over custody, over schedules, over where these kids are going to school, community property, separate property, accounts, real estate, cars….. And I have been so angry feeling like a crusade that I started when Big Bro was born to live a simpler life in a community with great school districts has fallen on deaf ears and caused the downturn in our marriage. But, what done is done. The past is the past. We have been through pain and I have cried too many tears over the past two years in particular. We are still in the process of divorce and I just want this to be done with. I’m done. I’ve had it. I want it over. I want to move forward. I want each of us to move forward and make sure that our kids are happy and have what they need, what they deserve.
So, happy birthday co-parent. Let’s try to get this done with. Please be reasonable and respectful of me and I will be the same to you. Let’s move forward without too many more scars. Our kids will be better off if we are able to do that with one another.
And now, a plug for a GREAT service that I used today: TaskRabbit.com. Think Craigslist but with a captive audience of pre-screened “rabbits” that will do your task for you. I used them in the past to build a Home Depot shed for me. I used them tonight to deliver 8 helium balloons to co-parent’s house (our old house) tonight for his birthday party with our four kids and a close friends/neighbor’s four kids as well. I called there and the party seemed to be in full swing with the kids fighting over the colors of the balloons. I should have ordered only one color. Oh well.
PLEASE TRY OUT TASKRABBIT AND USE PROMO CODE: PAL294191 FOR A DISCOUNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So, life goes on with ups and downs, with celebrations and scars, but also with help and support. I guess the trick is to seize the happy moments knowing that there will be scars to come – but hoping nonetheless that you can get through them and come out on the other side stronger than where you started.
Til tomorrow –
– Mama K
I turned 42 today.
Half of my life ago and on the evening before my birthday, I attempted to keep up with friends who were buying me too many shots for my 21st birthday. I promptly proceeded to vomit an entire box of raviolis into the bushes outside of the bar where we were celebrating.
Today, I go to work and have a series of planning meetings for the company. I go out to dinner with a friend and co-worker (and her husband, and her two small kids) who will soon be leaving the company and this city. I will miss her. Thank you Ro for making my birthday special.
And then I go home to an empty house, with the exception of a mailbox full of mail and a guinea-pig that we recently named (“Cocoa”). I threw in some laundry. I put on the lawn sprinkler. I watered my newly planted trees and berry bushes.
I did not hear from the kids today, nor was I expecting to. I will see them on Wednesday AM and will have them all day Wed, Thursday, and Friday until 6 PM.
What a difference 21 years makes.
Til tomorrow –
– Mama K
I didn’t post yesterday since it’s been REALLY busy the past two days. My dad is here with his wife; I’m thankful for their visit, am psyched for them to see this new life, and excited about the kids and their experiences with Pop-pop and Emmy. The kids have been talking about the visit and were so excited to see them.
Highlights:
Thursday
Friday:
I am feeling reasonably good; I feel even better about the decisions I made with this house. It was the right thing to do given the circumstances. It is the right thing for our family. I am ready for this upcoming birthday and feeling reasonably OK with where I am in life now despite the friction around me.
Have a great weekend all –
– Mama K
It is the end of the day and I can’t even begin to explain the complexities of my day today. I was working, running, picking up messes, delivering client presentations, baking cupcakes, wiping butts, … …. …. and sometimes you work so hard and it just doesn’t matter.
Highlights of the Morning and Commute:
Highlights of My Working Day:
Dinner and Bedtime:
They are both drifting to sleep now as I type this outside of their rooms. I had a very busy, hectic, crazy extreme day. Lots of kid-time, but lots of disasters. Flooded kitchens, crazy conference calls, last-minute back up child care, a child’s birthday, missing cupcakes, and a Director that doesn’t understand what it is like to be a mother consultant of four small kids that is going through a divorce AND buying a house and thinking about cupcakes and what to do tonight to make her son’s birthday special. He just doesn’t get it. I was THERE at the meeting and in the end it doesn’t matter. I will hear about how I was distracted.
At least the kids were all happy today. At least Batman is beginning to trust our family. At least the closing on the house looks promising for tomorrow. And at least we are all breathing, and living, and with each other in this moment. And at least Big Bro had a great birthday, from what I can tell.
Til tomorrow –
– Mama K
It was Red’s birthday over the weekend and Big Bro has one coming up this week; so we had a joint-birthday celebration for the two of them over the weekend.
I’ve always been excited about birthdays. It really is a momentous time, and not just about a cake and a gift. Its the celebration of someone’s life. It’s about showing that you care about that person – that you see that person – and that they are special to you and they mean something to you. And that hopefully you are a better person because their life is intermingled with your own.
So I make my kids’ birthdays special. I try to make them FEEL special during their day. Waking up with a helium balloon tied to their bed, walking downstairs with a string of balloons on the railing, the cake, the special dinner, the extra hugs and kisses.
This year my kids celebrated with their friends, scooters, cake (of course), going out to breakfast, going to a museum, going out to dinner, getting ice-cream, and getting THEIR FIRST PET. Yes, I caved and we went to PetCo and bought a pet. The animal that appeared to be best for our young kids was a guinea pig and we sat there with one and each of the kids held it and pet it. They all wanted him. He is black. We named him Batman.
So I’m typing this after a very full weekend, and with Batman in my room. It’s been only half a day and his cage already stinks. Or, maybe I’m just not used to the smell yet. Maybe it will get better. But the kids love him so far, and they are excited about caring for him and cleaning up his poops. Let’s see how long that lasts.
Staying sane? I know. I’m questioning that too.
Have a great week all –
– Mama K
Today was my day off from work. I had the Twins as usual, but today I also wanted to steal Red from her daycare. Her birthday is coming up over the weekend and I wanted her to have cupcakes to bring into the class. So I wanted her to spend time with me shopping and preparing for baking event.
Highlights of the Morning:
Highlights of the Day:
Dinner and Bedtime:
So now I’m in bed and very drained. I loved the time with the kids but there is so much going on right now in terms of the divorce, me buying a house, and work/final deliverables…. I feel like I’m getting hit in all directions and there is no one on my side. But I refuse to give up. I’m from the East Coast and we’re made of stronger stuff out there. Must be the water.
Til tomorrow –
– Mama K
The days come and the days go but every now and then there comes a day that is special. With young children, the birthdays are special times. I’ve always been very big with birthdays. It is a time to stop and to focus on an individual and celebrate the person and the fact that the person is in your life. I love the days leading up to a birthday – especially the days leading up to a child’s birthday.
Today was one of those days, and it was a double-special day, in many ways. Our twins turned two. Two bodies, two lives, a brother and a sister, celebrating their second year of life. I remember when we found out we were having twins, and then the day they were born (Twin Crazy at 6 pounds 5 ounces, and Twin Husky at 6 pounds 12 ounces), and many of the days leading up to today.
They knew it was their birthday. They would raise their hands when we asked whose birthday it was. Twin Husky has been walking around for several days now practicing his “happy birthday” tune. And the cutest thing is that when I would ask one whose birthday it was, they would say their sibling’s name first. I think that’s amazing. A pair. A set. Two children. Two years.
So in the midst of day-to-day life, and life’s ups and downs, and endings and new beginnings, it was wonderful for me to stop and take the day to celebrate the lives of two people that have forever changed my life. My goal was to make it special for them – and they both said they had a great day. We had a small party with close friends and young kids – and the cake and ice-cream overflowed and we let everyone indulge.
So to my twins who are growing up so fast, Happy Birthday to you and thank you for these years and thank you for giving me a reason to be thrilled for this weekend!
Love you both dearly –
– Mama
Mama In Motion™ 