February 20: Ending the 3-day weekend

The end of a 3-day weekend – bittersweet in many ways. Weekends are hard for me these days so 3 days makes it tough to get excited about. Today was a good day though –

  • I woke up early and continued laundry; the kids were up so I grabbed all the sheets for the last load of the week. I love the smell of fabric softener. I find it comforting.
  • All kids were up and sitting across on the couch getting ready for some T.V. Thankfully, Big Bro did not buy any movies. I still can’t believe he knows how to do this now. Then 3 of the kids broke out the funny animal hats and started playing with each other and pretending they were birds, dogs, ducks…. so cute.
  • I made a huge pancake breakfast; got the kids dressed; played a bit.
  • I took Big Bro and Red out for the morning. We just did some shopping – Big Bro needed some shoes and I needed a laundry bag. Both kids were GREAT with these activities. Big Bro originally wanted shoes with pictures on them or ones that lit up, but he’s in a size now for bigger kids and the shoes don’t really have those styles. He picked out a decent pair of black and bright yellow sneakers. He likes them. They both helped me at Bed Bath and Beyond for a laundry bag, and even saved me money since they both picked the cheapest one. I’m watching what I’m spending like a hawk now since I have to. I never thought I would go backwards in my standard of living but now it is inevitable so I’m changing behaviors definitely now.
  • At home, all kids were re-united and Big Bro initiated an activity for them all. He brought out markers and stickers and paper and had everyone on the floor creating art. I loved watching them and thought it was great that Big Bro took the initiative like that and that they were all sharing stickers and helping each other with caps, pulling the stickers off the sheets, etc.
  • Made lunch at home; kids napped in clean sheets.
  • They woke up and I gave them baths and showers. I love the smell and feel of clean kids. I love how they cuddle up to you. I cut 80 fingernails and toenails, my weekly ritual.
  • I made home-made pizza for them for dinner – Trader Joe’s has pre-made doughs that I keep in the freezer. Afterwards we had ice-cream. And watched TV. Big Bro played a Spongebob 2x since I didn’t watch it with him appropriately the first time. He really notices if I am watching it with him. He likes to do things with me and if I am distracted even sitting next to him is not good enough. So I paid attention the second time around, and made sure to comment throughout the show so we were talking about what happened.
  • Bedtime for the Twins tonight. I get Big Bro and Red tomorrow night. This didn’t work out well for Big Bro and Red. They were both crying and clinging to me. Big Bro more so than Red. He is very attached and this forced separation while I am still in the house will be difficult for us. I need to talk to our Child Custody mediator about this. Maybe/hopefully it will get easier for him during the week. Even Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were consoling him tonight after he barged into their room while I was sitting with them reading a book.
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So, the 3-day weekend is over, I survived. We divided and I had good fun with both groups of kids; attended a birthday party, went to the zoo, and did normal day-to-day routine things with the kids.

Red is asking when she will be able to share a room with Twin Crazy – a “girl” room – I reply “someday soon” and cannot wait to be painting a room pink for my little girls. I have to be patient and know that soon that day will come. It will just be tough getting there.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K


February 8: Motion

Wednesday – my 1/2 work and on flex time. I’m writing this at the end of the day so this is likely to be brief:

Highlights of the Morning:

  • I woke up feeling great. I got showered and dressed in a comfortable pair of jeans, and was upstairs with all the kids as they got up. Diaper changes with the Twins is best while in their room since it’s warmer up there. They are so sweet. Twin Husky had his hair all over the place and he is so cuddly and warm. So sweet.
  • I grabbed oatmeal for the girls and got Big Bro’s breakfast ready; also packed up the bags and got clothes ready for everyone.
  • Twin Crazy helped me unload the dishwasher. She is very helpful these days.
  • Big Bro’s foot went through his gaping hole in the other knee of his jeans. I give up. He thought it was hysterical (so did I).
  • Big Bro wanted to ride his bike to school. THIS WAS A FIRST FOR US!!! We met up with the Motley Crew and I was a bit nervous since I knew Big Bro was probably a bit anxious. He did great. Did not fall once, and even went ahead with the kids towards the end of the ride. At the end, his face was beaming and one of his crew wanted to lock his bike with Big Bro’s. So cute. I’m so proud of him.
  • I strolled the Twins to daycare and we talked about the fog, how it looked like the clouds were hanging low, and how we could feel wetness on our faces. Twin Crazy pointed and talked about the dogs along the way.
  • I walked back home, feeling really good. I felt the blood pumping through my body as I walked and it felt good to be going at a fast pace. It felt good to be moving. To be headed somewhere. I was thinking about the work I needed to do. I had things to get done, but nothing too overwhelming. I felt happy to be headed home to work. To have a short but productive day.
  • I got home, grabbed some breakfast, loaded the dishwasher, threw some clothes in the dryer, straightened up a bit, and got my computer/phones set up for the working day.







Highlights of My Working Day:
I actually got a lot done today

  • I went back and forth via email related to some work I might be doing for a separate project – they need some market interviews done and I want to make sure I understand the client and the product before I set up interviews – I don’t want to waste my limited time talking to the wrong part of the market.
  • I documented the planning meeting minutes for both of our forums in April. This actually helped me organize my thoughts on what I had to do soon to get these meetings planned.
  • I also started to think through the polling that we may want to do with the participants so we can plan an Agenda that is the most valuable for them. I drafted the topic content into survey format and am hoping I can offload the coding to someone else to get this done and out.
  • I reached out to some potential speakers for one of the forums. We received a positive response back so I am pumped!!!!!
  • I then packed everything away – cords, computers, phones, papers. I’m getting the kids!

The Rest of the Day:

  • I picked up Big Bro first and he had a great time riding his bike to the van.
  • We then waited for Red to wake up from her nap. While waiting, we thumb-wrestled.
  • Big Bro, Red, and I then went shopping for Twin Crazy and Twin Husky’s birthday. Red actually mentioned it to her teachers but she didn’t mention that I was going to “steal” her earlier today. So she was excited about going shopping with us today.
  • They were great at Wal-mart. The only things on the list were presents for Twin Crazy and Twin Husky, and also party decorations. Nothing else. They had great self-control. We picked their presents and decided on Sponge Bob for the theme of their party. Big Bro helped to put all of our items on the cashier belt. He was very proud of his efforts.
  • We then went to get Twin Crazy and Twin Husky. It was really early – 3:30 PM. Once at home, I gave them a snack and then decided to take them for a walk.
  • The walk was great. Big Bro was on his bike, Red was on her scooter, Twin Crazy was on a tricycle (that I pushed), and Twin Husky decided to walk his Tigers in a toy stroller (along with a helmet). Again it felt good to be moving. To be strolling with the kids. The weather was great and the sun was out. I was feeling like life was pretty good then and now. The children in great spirits, enjoying the outside, moving their bodies, and each moving in their own way. We are a collective little unit but again we are individuals. Everyone moving their own way – but also helping each other along the way. Twin Husky kept asking about Big Bro, who kept riding ahead of us or circling around to ride behind and away from us. They were so cute. Big Bro was even getting brave and testing his bike and his riding and balancing abilities… riding/coasting with his feet off the pedals…. so brave. We had a great time and even met some strangers along the way who might turn out to be great friends!
  • I made dinner – fish, string beans, rice. Kids were eating well. They had some nervous energy so I put them to work cleaning up their toys.
  • I read a book to Red about friendship and then we went to look at her class picture and we talked about the names of all of her friends at school.
  • After dinner I folded laundry while the kids watched a movie. It was a cute night. They all went to bed easily. Big Bro read a book to us. This is the first night that Red is not crying herself to sleep.












I had a great day. I feel like I accomplished things at work during the 1/2 day, got a lot of things done around the house, and had a great time with all of the kids. They are amazing. I am very lucky.

I am not thrilled about divorce and am scared of the outcome. I’m scared about strangers potentially deciding on the future of our children. This is going to have such an impact on their lives and affect them in ways I can’t even wrap my head around. This just isn’t right. I don’t think I’m an ordinary mother. I feel so in tune with each of these kids. And I enjoy being a mom. How is it possible that I can be taken away from a part of their lives? How could this be seen as in their best interest??!??!?!??!? Can’t we find a way to both be integral in their lives without the other being torn away???!?!?!?!??!

Til tomorrow –
– Mama K

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