Staying Sane: Home security botched my shower

I have so many ideas that I want to write about for “Staying Sane” for working mothers. Ideas are flooding me at completely random times. And with these thoughts, I can’t help but draw a connection to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. I wrote about the Hierarchy of Needs and the implications to working mothers more than one year ago — see post here. It is amazing to me the difference of where I was emotionally and with my life between then and now… but the Hierarchy of Needs still applies to me now – even though my situation has changed so much. I can’t help but think that as I continuously evolve and grow as a person, as a mother, and now as a Head of Household where I must work to not only contribute for my family but also survive… that this Hierarchy of Needs will still apply to me with the different roles that I play. I can’t help but wonder how the levels and extent of my happiness will be correlated with this… this is a topic that I will continue to explore in the future.


Anyway, one of the needs closer to the foundation is in this model is Safety. “Security of body, employment, resources, morality, the family, health, property.”

When I first moved into my new house, my very FIRST house, as a newly separated mother of four young children, Safety was top on my mind. Safety of the neighborhood, safety of the structure of the house that I just purchased, keeping my family IN and potential trouble OUT. Of course there were other issues of safety as well (e.g., resources, health, etc.) but I want to focus on this house. Of this new home. Of being on my own again after 10 years but now also being solely responsible for the health and safety of four little ones when they were in my care. A house and a home was important to me. But I also wanted to make sure that I was doing everything in my power to keep this new home SAFE for me and my children.

So I caved into the many “new neighbor” flyers and advertisements that were sent to me and a bought a home security system. This does not come without a cost. Installation and set up was expensive. The monthly service fee is expensive for me since my resources are now so strained. But for me, the cost is worth the added piece of mind.




So far the system has worked quite well.  It not only helps me to feel secure, but the kids as well.   When they used to get “scared” at night from the “kitty cats” and the “alligators”, I was able to show them how I lock the doors and set the security alarm.   They watched me intently.  And then we would go back to their rooms and talk about being scared and how they were in fact very safe in this house.   Talking to them helped to make it easier.

Another benefit is the “chime” whenever the front door or back door is opened, even when the alarm is not activated.  This helps me to control my kids.   I know precisely if one of these little explorers is leaving the house.   Very handy indeed.

Regardless of this, I do feel very safe in the neighborhood and I often keep my car unlocked.  And even my doors unlocked during the day.  Today was no different…


I was looking for my wallet (yes, I am forgetful and misplace things easily) and decided to look in my messy minivan.   I started to gather lots of things that needed to be taken out so that I could clean it up a bit (yes, I am messy and the minivan looks like a disaster).   I didn’t realize it but I hit the emergency button on the alarm key fob.   I thought I heard something, but wasn’t sure since I was in the car.    When I got out I realized it was the home alarm and quickly entered my password.  I did not receive a call-back so I thought I was within the normal amount of time that would not trigger a call to the police.  I was wrong.

After cleaning out the car I decided to take a shower since I felt grimy.    It is not often that I am able to enjoy a shower – particularly with four young kids.   So when I get the “alone” time, I relish in the long, hot showers that are uninterrupted.    That is when I heard a loud, deep, male voice.    And almost shit myself while I was in my own shower.   I turned off the water, in shock.   I screamed – who is this?  Who is there??!??!??!?!??!?!??!?!?!??!?!      Wondering what I had to arm myself – which was not much.   Maybe some tweezers or a toe-nail clipper.   Or some high-heeled shoes.    Again, the loud, deep voice.

“SHERIFF!!   ARE YOU OK???!!!?”

I jumped out of the shower and threw on my robe as fast as I could and there were these two huge guys in uniform and guns in my bedroom asking me if I live here (yes) and if I’m OK (yes) and if I was an intruder who decided to take a shower in the owner’s house (ha, not funny assholes, I almost shit myself in my shower just now).   Sure I fantasize about a husky man waiting for me on the other side of my shower, but two guys is a bit much, and certainly two guys from the police department under these circumstances was NOT what I had in mind.

So as these guys left my house, I was still saying to myself “oh shit, oh shit” and thankful for this security system.   And yes, there were neighbors on the street who were outside wondering if anything indeed was wrong at the single-mother of four kids’ house on their block.   I am thankful for their concern.

So, now that the security system has been successfully “tested”, I can rest easier tonight and in the future.   And I think I’ll talk to the kids about it too, if I can figure out a way to do so that does not tempt them to “call” the police officers over to our house again on their own.

Hope you are having a great weekend everyone –

– Mama K

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