March 20: Feeling too old for horsie-back rides


I’m tired this morning and I know that I have PLENTY to do at work – a good thing, I suppose.

Highlights of the Morning and Commute:

  • Red had a really hard time going to sleep last night. But despite this, she is still the first one to wake up in the AM. She woke up at 6:20 AM calling for me, and I went to get her and brought her downstairs since it was soon time to get up anyway. She sat in my room and we talked. She saw the empty bowl of ice-cream sitting on my bedstand from last night and she totally caught me. “Hey, what’s that bowl of ice-cream doing over there?!???!?!”. She giggled when I told her that not only did I have ONE bowl of ice-cream last night, but I had TWO bowls….. we were both laughing together at that.
  • I showered while she hung out in my room.
  • Chocolate Tuesday! Kids were loving it. Chocolate Nutella was everywhere. Twin Crazy and Red were sharing a butter knife and picking the chocolate goodness off of the knife together.
  • Big Bro was still sleeping, but when I told him it was Chocolate Tuesday he smiled and said he forgot about that. And, he was able to ride his bike today. So, he had lots of good reasons to get up this morning. He agreed and rolled out of bed.
  • I gathered the extra socks that daycare requested. I also made myself instant coffee. I styled my hair and put on make up.
  • I diapered the twins and kissed their faces. I consoled Twin Crazy for something that upset her. I helped Red get dressed. Big Bro was anxious about riding and I kept a careful eye on my watch to let him know when it was OK to get ready.
  • Twin Crazy and Twin Husky had fun in the front seat of the van while we were getting our things together. Twin Husky wanted to sit in Big Bro’s car seat to feel like a big kid so I let him.
  • All drop offs were fine. We were ahead of schedule.
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    So now I’m on the ferry and still a bit tired, and extremely hungry. I’m looking forward to a real big coffee and maybe a chocolate croissant. I love my new office. There are so many things nearby – banks, drug stores, lunch spots, people. Activity. Movement.

    I will have a lot of work to do today but honestly I have 4 hours of back-to-back meetings. How do you get work done when your time is spent like this? And I know that there are to-do’s that will come out of these meetings so that just adds on the work load. Our forums our exactly one month away so this is crunch time. I have 5 presentations to personally prepare for and deliver during these forums, speakers to still secure, speakers to coordinate logistics, presentations to review, and communications to make sure occur between the participants and the presenters. In addition to this, I also have a client project to manage, and the end of the project will occur AT THE SAME TIME. Seems like too much, right? I agree.

    I am feeling good, I think that putting on nice clothes and having hair and make up done help. I feel like a person. I’m looking over at the ex on the ferry and his eyes are closed. Typical. I’m not missing anything from that relationship. So much about him was so hard to reach. So unknown. So much unsaid. I’m sure he feels but does not express and avoids any kind of conflict. He’d rather just close his eyes and dream it away.

    Highlights of My Working Day:
    Busy! Back in the office which was great!

  • I got in and responded to some emails
  • Conference call for a potential business opportunity
  • Internal meeting regarding our sales pipeline and initiatives; I gave all updates on what I’m pursuing and the team seemed energized on the opportunities
  • Meeting to sync with conference planning on one of the forums
  • Team meeting regarding to client project and other data to gather; billing and invoicing
  • I spent time with outreach to speakers and potential members. Will likely have to do some work this evening.
  • I’m tired, but looking forward to the kids. I hope tonight’s bedtime routine is not as bad as last nights.

    Dinner and Bedtime:

  • I picked up Red first, then Twin Crazy and Twin Husky. Twin Husky wanted to sit in Big Bro’s seat. Twin Crazy was crying for her baby, whom she was missing all day today. We then went to pick up Big Bro, and then followed him (5 mph, with hazard lights on) along the slow streets to our house.
  • I cooked dinner and the kids were playing really hard together. Lots of laughing and no crying! No-one being mean!!! They were just having a really good time with each other!
  • Together we all took a short walk to the mailbox to get the mail.
  • After dinner I did some horsie-back rides with all of the kids; also some airplane rides and flips.
  • I was with Big Bro and Red tonight; we picked out clothes, read our books, and they were in bed by 8 PM. So far Red is not crying. So far so good.
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    I am so tired today. I feel crushed, physically and mentally. I feel like I need to relax but it is almost impossible to do so. Between big work meetings coming up, and things with the divorce, it is extremely hard for me to just decompress and unwind.

    Til tomorrow –
    – Mama K

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