Thursday. My day off with the children. I’ve been busy so far, and the day is only 1/2 over….
Highlights of the Morning and Commute:
Now I’m typing this up in Big Bro and Red’s room, right next door to them. I need to have them up by 2:45 PM so I can pick up the others – I signed them up for a gymnastics class today and am curious as to how that will go.
I’m having a fun day. We did so much already. And I feel like I can get things done around the house while they play; they kind of hover around me. If I’m folding laundry we’re still talking with each other as they are playing next to me. If I need to go somewhere else in the house I have these two little ones following me around. They really like to help and they are THIRSTY for looking and seeing everything I do. And Twin Crazy is adamant about doing things herself. And they are even cuter when they smell good and are freshly bathed. There’s nothing like holding a clean kid.
The funny thing though about these days is that I still have my mind on work. I think it’s because I know that we won that client project and that my time is going to be stretched thin. My phone also gets personal as well as work emails. So it “bings” and I’m checking email throughout the day. But I need to. I can’t be “off the grid”. I need to be available in case something urgent comes up. I need to make this arrangement a success for me as well as my company. So I never really let go of the reigns of work.
I’m also obviously thinking about the divorce. And the process. And the money involved. And how I wish we were just going through mediation without having the courts and lawyers involved. But I didn’t start it this way – so am forced to follow. The uncertainty is unsettling. This is my life but so much will be dictated to me. I just want what is best for my kids. If I can trust this process to trust that things will be decided that is in their best interest, then I can live with that.
After Naps:
It was an amazing day. I feel like all the kids are growing and developing so fast – they are changing it seems daily. I then feel like 3 are moving forward but one (Red) is regressing a bit. I think she understands more than what she lets on. I worry about her.
It was such a great day with great moments with each of the kids. I am still shocked that Big Bro is a “reader”. He is so excited and proud of himself too. I want that feeling to last for him for a long time.
Til tomorrow –
– Mama K
Mama In Motion™ 
I’ve been following your blog for a while now and I just want to say how impressed I am with how you devote time to your career and children and having a life of your own. I can barely sit down to write with one child and a full-time job!
And I know every divorce is different, but coming from a home that divorced when I was 13, I must say from a child’s perspective your sensitivity to how your child is coping is admirable. If there was ever a time to get absorbed in your own personal affairs, it would be now, but your awareness of how your daughter is handling this is amazing. My mother had a difficult time with the split, and definitely had her period of needing to care for herself. But she soon recovered and even during that time held my hand as best she could. And to this day I am proud of how she came through it and feel grateful for how she helped me to accept my changing family. As hard as that time was for me and everyone involved, I think a lot of how my mom handled it helped me to still have good memories – it is not a dark time in my life. From what you are saying, I don’t think you’ll have anything to worry about with any of your children. They are immensely loved and cared for and if I am any indication I think those feelings will color their memories of this trying time.