November 22: First love notes

Chocolate Tuesday! And the kids set out their clothes the night before! This made the morning relatively easy compared to others…

Highlights of the Morning and Commute:

• I woke up to see a magnetic board of more of Big Bro’s sentences. I couldn’t believe it. I guess he was working on it as he was going to sleep the night before. This was an AMAZING way for me to wake up.

• Twins were up and we all said our good mornings to each other in Big Bro and Red’s room. Red asked me to help her get dressed. She ran downstairs for Chocolate Tuesday.
• After I showered suddenly Twin Husky appeared in my room saying “Mommy! Mommy!”. I’ve really noticed a difference in our connection since I’ve been staying home on Thursdays and Fridays with them. I feel like I’ve been able to strengthen this relationship just by being there. Then Twin Crazy made her way up. As I was getting changed, both were in my closet talking about belts, shirts, scarves. Twin Husky is talking up a storm. Twin Crazy understands everything but still talks in a slurry time of language and it seems like Twin Husky understands.
• Downstairs, things were easy schmeasy. I got my coffee ready. Red rejected her pants so I got her a different pair. I helped Big Bro get dressed even though he doesn’t need help (but needs me). He was really excited about “day camp” at Red’s school – especially I think because one of his friends is also there. He is adamant for some reason against bringing a jacket. I don’t know if this is some sort of peer pressure or if he really is very hot blooded.
• Twin drop of was great; Red and Big Bro drop off was great. They mentioned to me that Jackets are a rule so I went to the car to bring out a sweatshirt for Big Bro. He did not cause a fuss. He was busy playing with pine cones with his friend.

They all seemed really happy this morning. I wish I could say the same for me. For some reason I just feel empty. Maybe its because we’re going into Thanksgiving which is normally one of my favorite holidays – but there’s so much going on at home and also with my step dad (pancreatic cancer) that I feel like I’m not where I need to be right now. I feel the need to be back on the east coast with my family who is hurting now. And as a family here we are also doing hurting of our own. I love the 4 days with the kids but am not looking forward to this upcoming holiday. I feel empty and tired and not in the right place. I need to put my best foot forward to make it nice for the kids.

For work, I have a lot of meeting scheduled for feedback from our forums. I am started a second round related to the second forum I am managing. I am going to take the opportunity during these calls to try to sell the members extra reports that are available to them and also drive up our revenue. I would also like to work on my client deliverable and FINALLY break the curse of procrastination.

Highlights of My Working Day:

I was busy but not terribly busy. And of course I didn’t get to the deliverable that I’ve been procrastinating over.

• I had two debrief sessions over two different forums and received some great perspective on moving forward.
• I had an interview with a market player for my client project and learned some new things to help inform our work.
• I lead a go-to-market meeting for another forum we are trying to develop and coordinated with folks internally to figure out who was going to “own” each potential contact.
• I also looked at some of the services and associated prices for these services that we charge one of the forums. There are some questions I have that we will need to figure out.

And no work done on my deliverable!!!! Ugggh!!!

Dinner and Bedtime:

• Pick up with the kids was fine; Red was proud of her Thanksgiving hat and also her placemat where she made little turkeys out of her handprints. I missed her class’ Thanksgiving feast – I do feel badly about that but I needed to be at work today. I’ll make it up to her during the 4 day holiday weekend. But to look at her little face with that hat on just breaks my heart…

• I came home to a house smelling like cooked food; Hubby was home early and cooking. While dinner was cooking the Twins were being adventurous with their little chairs again. I repramended them and put their chairs in the closet. Kids ate well. I lit a Pumpkin Pie candle and had a beer.

• After dinner the kids had a great time having a parade and using my legs to go “under the bridge”. I was doing this with Red on my back, Big Bro pushing around a rocket ship scooter, Twin Husky pushing a toy stroller, and Twin Crazy pushing a toy shopping cart (with twin babies inside…). We had a great time.
• At one point Big Bro was blocking a path and to get through the Twins had to give him a high-five. They caught on quickly. My password was a kiss. Twin Crazy gave me a kiss each time, but Twin Husky said “NO”.
• Bedtime was fine; kids enjoyed their books; I enjoyed having them in my lap and snuggling in close to me… asking questions about the book and observing new things from the pages that we have not noticed before, even though we’ve read the books 100+ times.
• I just returned from checking on the kids upstairs and I passed by a surprise that he left in front of our bedroom — oh my goodness this is just too cute. One day I will miss those nights of checking on them and finding these little love notes from a son that is learning how to read and write:

It was a good day. I love my new candle. I feel like I learned new things at work. I feel like there’s still more to do, but I’d rather feel a bit under pressure than bored. I love that I have a day with Big Bro tomorrow. I love that he is learning to read and write. I love that I have more of his notes to look forward to in the very near future. I love that after that we will have four days together. I love that Thanksgiving is coming up – it has always been my favorite holiday. I am missing my family though. The best we can do is take pictures of the food and send them to each other; or Skype. Or FaceTime with the new iPhones!!!

Til tomorrow –
– Mama K